Through to You

Harper

This is how it ends:

With me crying in a bathroom at the Crowne Plaza Hotel, cursing myself for being so stupid. I knew it was wrong, I knew it wasn&;t going to end well, I knew I was putting myself in a situation where I was going to end up brokenhearted.

I reach over and pull some toilet paper out of the dispenser and use it to blow my nose. My feet are killing me because of the stupid high heels I&;m wearing. I want to sit down, but there&;s nowhere to sit. I&;m in a bathroom stall, for God&;s sake. The only place to sit down is on the actual toilet, and it doesn&;t have a cover. Why don&;t the toilets in hotel bathrooms have covers? I&;m sure I&;m not the first person to end up in here crying her eyes out and looking for some privacy. Aren&;t there always scandalous things happening in hotels, things that would cause one to end up crying in the bathroom?

Okay, I tell myself, just calm down. It&;s not as bad as you think.

The problem, of course, is that it really is as bad as I think. I&;ve never had my heart broken before, and I wasn&;t expecting it to feel like this. I wasn&;t expecting to feel like I want to die. I wasn&;t expecting to be crying so hard my shoulders shake and I can&;t breathe.

The door to the bathroom opens, and I hear footsteps crossing the floor. A group of girls laughing as they reapply their lipstick. They&;re happy and excited.

Like I should be.

But I&;m not.

Instead, here I am.

Crying in a bathroom stall.

This is how it ends.

And I have no one to blame but myself.

I saw it coming.

I just couldn&;t stop it.